You've made the perfect choice of a life partner! Now how do you assure your relationship will stay healthy, happy and hot for a lifetime?
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Already Married? Keep Reading! This program is tailored to each couple, so we can design YOUR intentional relationship no matter if you've been together for a week, ten years or thirty years or more. It's never too late to do this work!
Consider This Your Insurance Policy.
According to Zola, the average wedding in 2022/2023 costs $20,000-$40,000 with 13% of couples spending between $50,000 and $100,000 on their wedding day. The average wedding also takes two years to plan.
According to Forbes magazine, the average cost of a divorce in 2022 is between $15,000 and $20,000 here in the United States. More complicated "contested" divorces - ones with disagreements around issues such as property distribution or child custody - often run up tabs well over $100,000. And that doesn't include the years you've invested, the hurt and pain you endure, and so much more in a failed relationship that you can never gain the time or energy spent in it. Add to that the failure rate for second marriages is greater than the first marriage, and the failure rate of third marriages is even greater than in second marriages!
The math is simple:
$30,000 - (conservative) wedding day
$10,000 - honeymoon
$15,000 - divorce with no disagreements or children involved
$55,000+ money down the drain if your relationship fails, PLUS all the years invested in your courtship, engagement, marriage plus the hassle and mess of getting divorced
OR
$750 and 12 hours of your time now to design your best chance at a happy, fulfilling marriage for the rest of your life.
According to Zola, the average wedding in 2022/2023 costs $20,000-$40,000 with 13% of couples spending between $50,000 and $100,000 on their wedding day. The average wedding also takes two years to plan.
According to Forbes magazine, the average cost of a divorce in 2022 is between $15,000 and $20,000 here in the United States. More complicated "contested" divorces - ones with disagreements around issues such as property distribution or child custody - often run up tabs well over $100,000. And that doesn't include the years you've invested, the hurt and pain you endure, and so much more in a failed relationship that you can never gain the time or energy spent in it. Add to that the failure rate for second marriages is greater than the first marriage, and the failure rate of third marriages is even greater than in second marriages!
The math is simple:
$30,000 - (conservative) wedding day
$10,000 - honeymoon
$15,000 - divorce with no disagreements or children involved
$55,000+ money down the drain if your relationship fails, PLUS all the years invested in your courtship, engagement, marriage plus the hassle and mess of getting divorced
OR
$750 and 12 hours of your time now to design your best chance at a happy, fulfilling marriage for the rest of your life.
If you're considering premarital education, you're in good company! According to The Knot's 2023 Real Weddings Study, 45% of Gen Z and 31% of Millennial couples attended premarital education in 2022.
Most of us spend more time preparing for our vocations than we do preparing for marriage. Maybe that is why we are more successful in our jobs than in our marriages. Yet life's meaning is not found in money but in relationships, and marriage is designed to be the most intimate human relationship. If you want a successful marriage, then spend time preparing. - Gary Chapman, PhD, author of The 5 Love Languages and professional therapist.
What if you could invest 12 hours in your relationship
to assure its success over the course
of the next 50 years? Would you do it?
Better question.
WHY WOULDN'T YOU?
Testimonials (don't just believe me!):
- "We're so glad we did this! We now have a plan on how to keep our relationship going strong and another on what to do if the sh** hits the fan."
- "Awareness and problem-solving will help in the future. Being aware of our love languages have already completely changed our relationship, which is crazy given we've been together for 9 years already. Now I understand her better and what she needs."
- "I have a better understanding and framework of how to go about filling his love bank other than just the usual ways."
- "That's it? We're done with the program? Where do we go now? We've already recommended this to 3 of our engaged couple friends!"
-"If we took our beginning assessments again, our results would be very, very different!" Said during Week 7 of the 10 week program
-"I've gotten compliments from my boss on how I address situations at work now, after completing this course. I think of you whenever I address a difficult situation and apply the techniques you shared with us."
-"This course completely changes the prospective on how you talk to and work with others."
-"We do fall back on what you taught us and are forever grateful for you!" - Two years after completing the course
-"Selfishly I'm excited you are moving things to a larger scale so *spouse* and I can continue to participate and learn from you!" (after learning about Hearts Unlimited's upcoming relationship podcast
One of my clients approached his dad as part of his homework, to interview him about his 30+ year marriage. That conversation led to this speech at their wedding. This is why I do what I do; why couples take this course and the effect it can have on all those around us.
vc: Vonnahme Productions
What Is It Exactly?
First of all, let's start with what it is NOT. You've already made the perfect choice of a partner! Marital education is not a judgment of that choice at all. Nor is it poking/prodding in your relationship to find cracks that may be problems either now or down the road.
It's a celebration of your love, commitment and learning how to make your relationship even better so it can last a lifetime. It's a chance to gain new skills that will support your relationship to become even stronger, more fulfilling and happier than you even thought it could be. It's an opportunity to become closer, more open and vulnerable with your sweetheart, and set the foundation for a lifetime that will be everything you want it to be, because you get to design it now.
Topics covered include:
- Defining What Marriage and Commitment Means To Each of You
- Understanding Partner Styles, Your Values, and the Roles You Play in Your Relationship
- The Seasons of Your Lives and How to Support Each Other As You Move Through Them
- Exploring Expectations and Where They Come From
- Discovering Your Communication Style and Learning How to Talk Productively With Your Partner
- Learning How to Prevent Conflict and Move Through it Quickly When it Arises
- Identifying your Love Languages for Both Giving and Receiving Love
- How to Keep the Sizzle Alive in the Relationship and How to Deal with Different Sex Drives and Desires
- Learning How to Forgive When Needed
- Gaining Secrets to Keeping The Love Alive from Those Who've Been Married for Decades
- and more!
Couples completing premarital education experienced a 30% decline in the likelihood of divorce after five years of marriage and a significant increase in overall marital satisfaction as well. - Survey results published in the Journal of Family Psychology.
I Promise You...
- Premarital education offers a safe space for each party to talk from their heart about things that matter to them
- Confidentiality is assured
- The decision you've made to marry each other is not questioned; it's respected and celebrated
- You will learn more about yourself and your partner than you knew when you began
- You'll have several tools and a map on how to keep your relationship healthy, vibrant and the kind your friends envy for years to come
- You will have a map on how to deal with difficulties should they come up
- Couples have said they feel difficult conversations have become easier to have even before completing the course
- Between sessions you'll have homework consisting of topics for the two of you to explore individually and talk about as a couple
Who Is This Course Designed For?
While virtually any couple will improve their relationship through this course, the ones who have truly seen the most benefit are those who:
- Have chosen their person for life and now are serious about wanting it to last
- Do the homework in between classes
- Have been with their partner for a while and want to take their relationship to a new, deeper level of intimacy and connectedness
- May question whether they had good relationship role models (may not have many happily successful couples surrounding them such as parents, siblings, friends, etc.)
- Have had past relationships that did not work well and are wanting this one to last
Certification of Course Completion
Some states (such as Minnesota) require 12 hours of premarital education to qualify for a discount on the purchase of a marriage license. This is done to reward and encourage couples who develop the skills that may help prevent many messy divorces from ever reaching the court system down the line as well as affect the lives of children who may be caught in the middle of those divorces. The state's governing agency may require notarized certification from the person offering premarital education that the course has been completed and the specifically required topics have been covered. This comprehensive course meets those requirements in many states and I'm happy to provide the certification upon completion.
Check with the jurisdiction where you will be applying for your marriage license to see if they require or suggest premarital education/counseling before applying, or if they offer a discount toward the price of a marriage license.
How Do We Meet?
We meet using Zoom video chat software, so you can live/work virtually anywhere!
- Individual Couples. Couples meet with Rev. Ronnie for an hour to an hour and a half over the course of 10 times to cover the material.
- Group Programs. Interested in a group program? Click on the link below and we'll notify you when the next program is ready to start.
- Couples Retreats. Get away for a weekend and complete the training without the typical daily distractions! You can do this at Basswood Chalet & Guesthouse in New Auburn, Wisconsin (one-on-one treats) or jump on the waiting list for the next group retreat held at different locations around the Midwest.
When Is The Best Time to Start the Program?
If you're newly engaged, you'll find that there are many details that require your immediate attention, such as booking your venue and key vendors (don't forget your officiant!) in the beginning. Then there's a natural 'lull' that happens before a flurry of activity ensues close to your wedding date. Somewhere in that middle is usually a great time to be able to focus on building your relationship even stronger than it already is, as the stress of wedding planning can be just that. Stressful!
Already married? No worries! Now that all the stress of the Big Day are behind you, it's a great time to set a strong foundation for the most important relationship of your lives.
What If We're Getting Married Before We Can Complete the Program?
No worries! It's more important that you gain the skills that will support your marriage than it is to have them before you say "I Do." Sometimes a couple starts the program but gets caught up in wedding planning and needs to delay finishing until after the wedding day, and that's ok as long as you're not asking for certification that you've completed the program for a marriage license discount.
Married Already And Kept Reading? Great! Here's the info directly related to you!
I often hear couples who are honest say to me "Yeah, we didn't want to do premarital education because, truth be told, we were kinda afraid that if we did, we'd be told we didn't belong together or shouldn't get married. We were already so invested in our relationship and wedding planning that we didn't want to do anything to rock the boat. Or in the alternative, what if we learned something about the other we really didn't want to know??? Now that we're this far in, we realize we might have benefited from learning some skills before we got into it." It's never too late!
Empty Nester Syndrome is real. Once the kiddos grow up and move out, the two of you need to redefine your relationship moving forward. Are you the same people you were when you first said I Do? Did Life change along the way? Even in the slightest? Ha!
Benjamin Franklin said "Those who fail to plan, plan to fail." Maybe you let Fate get you where you are today, but if you're not happy and your heart's not jumping for joy to see your sweetheart, maybe you're missing out. Now's the time to take control of the reigns and get intentional about designing your future together, based on new knowledge and desires of who you are, what you want and a guide to help you design how to get there. You - WE - can do this together!
Want to chat more before you sign up? No problem! Click on the link and let's do it. Life is too short not to be giddy happy and having fun with your sweetheart, every day.
Empty Nester Syndrome is real. Once the kiddos grow up and move out, the two of you need to redefine your relationship moving forward. Are you the same people you were when you first said I Do? Did Life change along the way? Even in the slightest? Ha!
Benjamin Franklin said "Those who fail to plan, plan to fail." Maybe you let Fate get you where you are today, but if you're not happy and your heart's not jumping for joy to see your sweetheart, maybe you're missing out. Now's the time to take control of the reigns and get intentional about designing your future together, based on new knowledge and desires of who you are, what you want and a guide to help you design how to get there. You - WE - can do this together!
Want to chat more before you sign up? No problem! Click on the link and let's do it. Life is too short not to be giddy happy and having fun with your sweetheart, every day.
